Got my results from my blood work and culture on my leg, and I have another infection and I have to go to back to wound care.
I’m so angry right now, and I’m just done.
I want my freaking health back, i want my life back.
I want to swim, and walk and dance and not be tied to a damn cane, or a scooter or a walker to get around. I want to be able to walk my happy ass to the farmer’s market and pick out my own things at a store that I can’t reach from a sitting position.
I know I am always Ms I got this and brave and strong according to people, but guess what I want to scream, and cry and be angry about the life that was ripped away from me by a stupid tiny freaking bacteria that most people get and it’s no biggie. not me, I have to freaking be special and damn it I just want my independence back.
I’m sick of pitting glances, and becoming invisible in groups, even with friends because I use a fucking cane, and I’m Just.. fucking DONE!
I’m tired of having a half a pharmacy’s medical supplies in my bedroom, I’m tired of bandages, and pain meds, and antibiotics, and face masks, wound care, and every freaking medical person needing to see ever scar and treat me not like an actual human being but just something to be poked and I’m just.. done.